I’m falling in love with you at first sight. It was 16. Until now, I’m still falling in love with you. And I feel so stupid, cause you never accepted my heart and I'm still in love with you. Falling in love with you was the first mistake. Asking you to stay was the second mistake. Waiting for you to come to me is my big mistake. Cause you in my mind and in my heart, I lock my heart for anybody. I don't know how long it will be. 

I know it's not your fall, it's mine. I shouldn’t have fallen in love with you. I have known that since the beginning. We can just be friends, not more. Your signal is a joke. I was just a temporary person for you. Accompany you when you are lonely, listen to your stories when you are sad. You call me when you need, while I always wait for you without knowing the time. I’m still waiting for you no matter how broken my heart is.

your act that looks like me, loves me, makes me distrust new people. I don't know how people really love me. And I don't know what love is like. How poor of me. My first love broke my life. But it's okay. I'm very happy we are still friends. I'm happy we still have each other even though we are not as close as before. We were supposed to be just friends. we were not supposed to fall in love with each other. I realized I’m not enough for you. I wish you would find your soulmate. Please don't come back again. Please ruin my heart so badly  that I don't expect your presence anymore. I can't say goodbye if you still come to me.

Let me be happy. Let me find my true love. I've never had a boyfriend, but my heart is already broken. I’m scared of being too close but also tired of being alone, and I'm scared of the future but also confused about the present. That's what I felt the whole night